Category Archives: Whimsical

04232014 Backwards Clocks

Backwards clocks are a reminder to stop assuming that there is a “normal” orientation for things. Even if there such a thing, it is a poor reason to insist on conformity. A huge dose of craziness is what makes life interesting.

You can order one through Amazon, among other places.

Please keep an eye on your friends or family if they are drinking while looking at these clocks. They’ve been known to cause brain freeze and bewilderment.

12122012 An Easy Xmas Ornament Idea

People needlessly spend a fortune on getting a yearly Xmas ornament for their tree. There are some very beautiful ones out there – and many which aren’t terribly expensive, either.

But if you are looking for a yearly ornament that is both cheap, easy, and will look almost exactly the same, year in and year out, look no further.

As strange as it sounds, you should use a dollar. Seriously. Each member of the family should sign his or her name on it in colors, then label the bill with the year in larger letters. You can then hang, roll, or place the bills year to year on your tree.

My wife and I now have 5 on our decorations. We even have one that is labelled as a “proxy dollar,” as my stepson thought it would be cute to “liberate” one the first year. It’s now part of the story of our ornaments, rather than detracting from it.

Since we didn’t do a tree this year, you can look on the very far right of the picture I attached to see the dollars in the lighting of my alternate Xmas decorations.

It’s fun, cheap, and different. What’s not to like?

Miscellaneous 7

“I didn’t mind the 4 deer in my yard. But the fact that 2 of them had shovels and the other 2 were wearing hard hats concerns me.” – X


“Nothing defines old age more than a disdain for current music.” -X

“No one is ever right. Even if they are, they are still often wrong.” – X

“I don’t mind that you don’t believe in evolution. In fact, I’m counting on it.” – X

“Twitter is akin to a sly fart immediately prior to a quick exit from the elevator. Facebook is a bellicose drunk with copy and paste.” -X

 

Colors? Normal? There Are No Real Rules

I’ve written several different ways about our tendency to choose the visually boring, usually due to a misguided belief that ‘normal’ is a real thing or that another person’s aesthetic should set our standard for us. Some of it is our growing expectation of perfection, which is laughable to me. Chaos and entropy always get the veto in our lives, yet we tread on this planet as if they don’t. Concepts of beauty, style and even art evolve. No matter how much you strive for ‘the look,’ your clothes, houses, cars and hair will all fall from fashion.

Sometimes, bland is easier, but sometimes it isn’t. We have to exert more effort to make things look ‘normal’ or ‘appealing,’ instead of allowing the different style to flourish. Just as I think that a broken voice is usually more interesting to hear, I think we lose much of our individuality through adherence to imagined rules about what looks good.

Whether it is the dark blue paint on our bathroom walls, a metal ceiling in the bathroom, wood trim made from abandoned tree limbs (and then painted yellow), shoes deliberately mismatched, or clothing of multiple colors, I think we do ourselves a disservice.

Occasionally, I’ll have an insight wherein I realize that I have once again drifted away from interesting for no other reason than to look ‘normal.’ This word almost universally translates into boring and without creativity.

Our tombstones should be distinct, without symmetry. The cars we drive should be as differentiated as wildflowers and the colors we choose should be infinite.   But somehow we persist in painting the world in that horrible shade of “Desert Tan.” Blah.

 

Irrelevant Blog Post Title Goes Here

“Propaganda masked as news, ignorance disguised as politics & greed dismissed as capitalism are the woes that plague us.” – Internet

“It is no accident that those who scream the loudest for you to speak only when you have something positive to say are usually the ones with the most interest in keeping you quiet.” -x

“Once you’ve stood on the shore of a vast ocean, you have no need to smell the pond.” -x

03052012 Wall Murals For Your Home + “CrazyWall”

Linnaea Mallette     http://goo.gl/uxzm5M  I know this is an outdoor mural, but imagine something such as this inside your house.

The older I get, the more I am intrigued and even convinced how much more interesting our lives could be if we would have wall murals in our houses. Murals are great along public walls, in restaurants or in art galleries.

As an addition to one’s home, I think they could not only be interesting, but a cheaper alternative to traditional walls, paintings or decorations. Granted, I would prefer ones painted by members of the family, friends, co-workers, etc. Otherwise, support an art student or local artists by giving them permission to do the best they can, or even to surprise you.  Murals can be “fixed” with a coat of paint. That’s not true of most decoration or style ideas in a house.

I know that we are supposed to be trapped and confined by our irrational obsession with “home value” and treat our lifeboxes as if they are nothing more than an investment to be devoid of interesting quirks and adornment. (By the way, I think “Lifebox” would be an ideal alternate name for the word “house.” It almost mocks the nature of what a residence is versus what it could be…)

(Another sidenote: we could convince HGTV to start another word’s creation: Crazywall. It would be used to indicate that an area or space has been deliberately done in a creative, crazy way.)

Wall Murals to Spark Your Imagination! (Click)

Prank / Fun Decoration Ideas

While it might not be traditional, one of the many things on my list of “what I would love to do” where I live is to use my “body outline” and “blood splatter” ideas to decorate my house.

If I had a large wooden plank porch, nothing would stop me from having a very well-drawn crime scene body outline on painted on the porch near the main entrance to the house. For visitors, it would be a warning to not expect normalcy from the residents inside. It certainly would be a great talking point, too. (By the way, I think a nice added touch would be to have the outline of the head a couple of feet away from the main torso, to evoke a beheaded crime scene.)

The blood splatter idea would incorporate exactly what it sounds like it would: red paint. I think the biggest impact for the blood splatter pattern would be to done in a white or lighter-colored room. You could get people you know to come help “spray and splatter” the room with the red paint, too. It would be a fun thing to do. Thinking about it, it would be another opportunity to use a crime scene body outline, too.

Finally, I would love to have a fake mouse hole either on the outside wall near the main door or in the living room. It of course would have the fictional mouse’s name on the door with other little details to make the effect realistic. Imagine how that would delight kids visiting your house. 
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04042014 Reusing Greeting Cards / Using the “Wrong” Card on Purpose

For this card, I bought a random category and then put my cousin’s picture on the front, drawing a low-tech beard, then scribbling out the words as needed on the inside.

For most of my adult life, I have tried to be goofy with greeting cards. Sometimes, I have inadvertently shown bad taste doing this but since I’ve never been known as someone with great taste, I don’t think I’ve damaged my reputation too much.

First, if you want to have a little fun, you should deliberately buy the wrong occasion card for someone. For instance, instead of a birthday card, send a sympathy card. Instead of a graduation card, send a bar mitzvah card. After a couple of times doing this, people will either laugh at your efforts or start expecting it. Many times, the crazy card that doesn’t conform will be the one remembered. Cards are usually so quickly forgotten that anything memorable about them is quite a feat.

Fifth, you should consider changing the words already written inside or on the card. Subtle changes can have a huge, humorous impact on the card’s intended meaning.

Second, if you are going to write a message, write it on the front of the card where people are reluctant to write – or on the back. Even better, write your message upside or wrapped around the edge between front and back – or any combination thereof for maximum effect.

First, write a totally wrong name on the card and/or envelope.

Third, write messages from people who don’t exist. Sign their name, too, make up fake shared experiences, or write a message as if you are a famous historical person. Write the message as if you are either totally serious or mentally deranged.

Another easy and creative way to personalize a boring card is to print a picture of the person and tape, glue or include it in or on the card. People get caught off guard when this happens and usually appreciate the little touch. If it is someone’s birthday, put a picture of them when they were very young. On the other hand, put someone a picture of a total stranger in the card to bewilder both the recipient and anyone else looking at the card.

While it is true that greeting cards can be quite boring, the reality is that is our own fault that they lack any spark or zest. With just a little creativity, greeting cards can be fun and interesting.

(I know I didn’t enumerate the points correctly, in order, or well. Gotcha! )