It’s a Wednesday Kind of Day

inhuman resources

I recently discovered that all managers are hired through a separate super-secret office…

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“My boss signed up for an ‘Anger Management’ class. He was excited about it until one of his subordinates told him that the premise of the class was that anger was a BAD thing.” -X

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Here’s another joke that I wrote for someone else, one that either makes you cringe or frown in recognition, based on something that actually happened to me, except for the part about me picking on smaller kids…

Be careful when you tell kids to pay attention. When I was young, I tried out for football. Well, I kicked two smaller kids on the way into the tryouts. The coach acted furious. “Why did you kick those smaller kids?” I couldn’t understand why he was asking, so I told the truth: “Based on the way your players have bullied me, I assumed it was behavior you enjoyed seeing on your team.”

#whysomad

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A quiet moment to hear the still voice telling you that the world isn’t as fear-filled as you would imagine it to be and that what unites us outweighs our differences….

silence

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Remember a few weeks ago when I posted about big changes to salary overtime laws? They are coming in December. Labor Secretary Thomas Perez was quoted when asked about some companies doing something stupid such as dropping wages for managers to counteract the new law: “You don’t respond … by lowering their wages. … it’s particularly imprudent to do so with folks who are running the place. It’s inconsistent with rational behavior.” Man, this guy must not have ever worked with the geniuses I’ve worked with. Doing illogical things for a dumb reason or for no reason at all is quite often THE method, rather than the exception.

*Legal Disclaimer: This post in no way refers to the current group of people who collectively may or may not have a say in my employment, wherever that might be. The current group is an elite commando team of incredibly talented and fiscally-minded intellectuals, not subject to the vagaries of satire or criticism.

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“Discerning felines enjoy the taste of Mapleton Cigarettes, made from both catnip and the hair from old ladies hairbrushes.”

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