Once the ad agency of Hodges And Hedge discovered that I never experience writer’s block, even when a heck of a lot of people would rather I did, they gave me a plum freelance assignment. Their usual staff writers were unable to get past the tame subject matter.

Even though I knew nothing about inclement weather safety and tornadoes other than the tried-and-true system of “Avoid It At All Costs,” I got to work.

Last Wednesday, I researched and wrote several pages of draft material. It was filled with data and advice, punctuated by wit. Without a second thought, I submitted it.

Thursday morning, I opened my email to find that the content editor was very unhappy with my work. “It’s not your normal style, X. We appreciate the draft, but we need something we can use, something which captures the essence of tornadic response but stated in a fanciful  way.”

Twenty minutes later, I submitted my abridged version.

The State of Vermont’s Department of Tourism bought the piece from Hodges and Hedge for $7,500.

Here it is:

I’m told that it is going to be used all over the midwest.

Is this story true or not? Ask Sarah Sanders.