Ardormorph: the process in which you love yourself and another to find a way to change with the goal of being happy.
If you want to be happy, you have to decide to be.
And then, the hard work.
Most people have a vague idea of what happiness or satisfaction even means. If you want love, you must learn what healthy love looks like.
If you want happiness, your personal life must reflect what you want out of it. It requires self-honesty and focus.
You must learn new habits, skills, and ways of communication.
If this is the last relationship you want to be in, you’re either all in or not. There is no middle ground.
That means forgiveness for being treated poorly and accountability for what you’ve done.
You can’t change what is behind you, nor can your partner.
Learning from it. Not repeating it.
Be tender. Be kind.
Discuss every aspect of what the future will look like. Please don’t shy away from it.
Don’t make your partner pay for mistakes others made in your past. This person is none of those.
It all starts with your commitment to stop trying to do things as you’ve done before. The behaviors weren’t effective, or you’d still be in a previous relationship. It seems obvious to say that.
Most of us keep repeating cycles and behaviors. We can’t do that and find happiness.
It requires change. Understanding. Listening.
Remember, you learn first and apply it afterward.
It starts with change.
In yourself and in the ways you’ve navigated being in love.