All posts by X Teri

Hate

Earlier today, someone shouted an old Spanish nickname of mine. It was an odd place to hear an old nickname. I remembered him immediately because he had the same smile, although it was hidden behind twenty additional years of hard-earned wrinkles. I will call him Sonrisa.

He told me he works with my old friend Carlos. After joking about the unlikelihood of Carlos working much and sharing a laugh, Sonrisa told me that Carlos was giving up on getting the citizenship that he had been promised for years. Both Carlos and Sonrisa are incredibly hard workers. Sonrisa told me a version of the same story I’ve been hearing repeatedly over the last few months: most of their cohort has given up on the United States being the promised land it once was. 

They’ll probably return to El Salvador. It will be a loss for everyone. Not only are they hard workers, but they’re funny even in English. 

They didn’t used to be prone to cynicism. Sonrisa remembered that I was one of the few gringos who actively stood out in the crowd in recognition of the contribution of Latinos. 

He wasn’t surprised when I told him that there was not much hope in sight to feel respected as long as the current crowd of political idiots get their way. 

I’m paraphrasing, but Sonrisa added, “You know he’s an idiot when he starts a fight with a friendly white country like Canada. I know if we go back to El Salvador we’ll experience similar authoritarian BS like we do here. But at least it won’t be based on prejudice.” He added, “I remember years ago when you said it was better for people to curse you directly to your face because then at least you knew who they were. We had a few great years here where the racists mostly kept to theirselves. We always knew it was there. But now? He gave them permission and gasoline to act openly.”

There’s no need to explain what people mean when they use the word ‘HE.”

I waved goodbye to Sonrisa and asked him to tell Carlos hello for me.

I silently hoped that 47 and the people who support him don’t get their way. But on the other hand, as always, a little part of me also hoped that they would continue to f*** around and find out.

Not only about the absence of a sufficient workforce to prop up our economy, but also the unavoidable consequences of believing that you can denigrate one group of people without harming the respect threshold for everyone else 

Hate breeds hate, and distrust contaminates everyone. 

There is no “them.” They are us and vice versa. You’ve simply avoided being targeted. Yet. 

Authoritarians and those who believe they have the right of superiority are never content. Fear-mongering is an appetite that never lessens.

X

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Over

47 himself said any president who presides over a 1,000 point drop on the DOW should be impeached immediately. We owe it to a man of such high honor to be held accountable to his own words. Unless they were just one in a million examples of the fatuous bullsh*t he’ll say to dupe enough people to be king.

He’ll offer his hateful brand of politics at the State of the Union address. Countless people who know better but feel like they have no choice will line up behind him to defend the nonsense he manages to enunciate.

Meanwhile, the country is in disarray. It certainly was not perfect prior to the second coming of 47, but it was manageable and subject to the terms and conditions of rationality and sometimes broken cooperation.

The carnage he creates will continue. The water will grow hotter and he will continue to create divides among those of us who would otherwise disagree passionately but still proceed about the business of living our lives in this country.

Donald, as Justin Trudeau correctly named him today, will destabilize our government sufficiently to render it unrecognizable. Even to those who support him. He’s already managed to destroy decades of relationships with our allies. Mathematically speaking, two points are sufficient to draw an infinite line. Likewise, the arc and trajectory of what he’s doing can only end in one place.

I catch myself wishing he would just get it over with and succeed in his ultimate goal to destroy the history and authority of the government we’ve all enjoyed until this point. So that in this manner, we would have no choice but to turn our eyes towards survival instead of feeding our souls with the foolish hope that the people we elected will stand up and demand that the Constitution be followed and to tell him that no man has the authority to circumvent the political process.

If we continue on this course, 47 will be the last president of the United States as we know it.

Chicken Little no longer has the energy to run amok and squawk that the sky is falling.

For all his supporters, I hope you get what you wish and deserve in your choices. That this paragraph sounds like a warning should itself be a worthy indicator of what you’ve chosen.

X
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The Danger of Uncertainty

One of the reasons apocalyptic shows and books are so fascinating is that they share the themes of human morality. When deprived of food, comfort, or stability, our prefrontal cortex surrenders to the amygdala, the lizard part of our brains. One of the truths of human nature is that much of our morality is built on the foundation of having our basic needs met. When your brain overwhelms your critical thinking, it takes a massive effort to overcome the instinctive response that results. People underestimate how complex our instinct mode is – or fail to appreciate how our brains misinterpret danger signals, even in everyday life. In short, you can’t think about goodwill toward men or write poetry when your belly growls.

The above partially explains why judging someone is easier when things get complicated.

This is one reason massive social change is a losing bet. While people might be fed, they lose their sense of continuity, security, and stability. Going hungry pulls the nail out of human decency. Too much change takes away people’s ability to cope. This is true even if the changes are favorable. It’s no accident that rapid technological change and its consequences bring anxiety. Because we’re all sitting in the same soup pot, we frequently fail to see the bigger picture because we focus on the symptoms rather than the central issue.

This is obvious to those of us who were threatened by the absence of our needs being met growing up—those who haven’t don’t experience the same reality. Your body and brain don’t forget the trauma caused by feeling threatened or in danger.

If a person or people in society reach the tipping point toward helplessness, things get ugly quickly. The 4% rule stipulates that only a tiny portion of the population can trigger massive social movements or react to sudden changes. It’s as if our collective subconscious realizes that the status quo isn’t working. We often seek a resolution, even a bad one, over continuing in the current state. We sometimes burn down the house to get rid of the houseflies.

This is another valid argument for ensuring that we care for everyone’s basic needs. If we do not strive to meet people’s basic needs, chaos will bubble up – and often universally trigger a volatile reaction.

Some are blind to the ideal of the American Dream that most of us grew up believing: work hard and be rewarded. Or that government is the cohesive force behind it all to provide stability. Current events have put these components in jeopardy. You can’t effectively destabilize the government without hitting the hornet’s nest of societal upheaval. If you monkey with the stability variable, you’ll get some nasty results. People will set their metaphorical houses on fire instead of rationally attempting to adjust to what feels like uncontrollable chaos.

It’s fascinating to watch the younger generations react. They are the critical ones, watching and learning invisible lessons. It falls to them to decide what will become of the mess the dinosaurs of today are creating. They don’t see themselves as the future because, like us, they mostly grew up thinking that society’s undefined “adults” had things in check. We do not. We are winging it and ignoring the dangers of continuing on this path of uncertainty.

These are just thoughts that not everyone understands.

X
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Fool’s Wish

Praying isn’t going to help my helpless and hopeless friends
God slept through the Holocaust, so I doubt he cares how this ends
He might have put all this in motion, but he’s left the building

Though you think you’re on the side of righteous
The other side thinks you’re completely wrong
Ain’t no use competing with deafness and fervor


We have to run and jump in the water no matter how deep we find it
Some of us are going to get pushed and experience confinement
But that’s going to happen anyway, even if we keep our hands at our sides

What you don’t know about bullies is that they don’t need an excuse
They’ll punch you even if your arms are at your sides
It’s a lesson learned by millions of women throughout history

Some people need enemies no matter how they find the world
Others take pleasure in inflicting harm and constant pain
You can’t placate or talk them down from their thrones

Bullies are hard-wired to respect nothing but violence
It takes a greater force to shut them up for good
Waiting for someone to step in is a fool’s greatest wish

No logic, compassion, or love will reach them
Wishing it won’t make it so
The only thing understood is karmic retaliation

God slept through the holocaust, so I doubt he cares how this ends


JD And DJ Rage

The lady listening to JD and DJ give a master class on narcissist idiocy accidentally gave the world a recap of what the people in the room were witnessing.

Watching the videos of JD and DJ attacking Zelensky made me embarrassed and infuriated.  There’s a reason such behavior shocks. Presidents do not behave that way. Raging alcoholics might. Narcissists definitely do, but usually in private. 

How anyone versed in history or politics could see this behavior as anything other than a huge red flag baffles me.

It’s not strength. It’s toxicity. 

People who demonstrate this type of behavior have no place in politics or government. 

JD was already pissed off because the special sofa he asked for was not made available for the meeting. 

DJ oozes the type of demeanor and behavior that defines him. 

Our previous allies were already on a razor’s edge about the mountain of incredible things that have come out of the mouths of our administration. 

Because I follow a lot of international news, I can tell you that while the United States might be feared, this is the equivalent of waiving a gun around in a room. Our previous allies are no longer looking at Trump as a buffoonish distraction. They understand that he is leading our country toward something unrecognizable and as a threat to world stability.

X

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Mannequin Ursula

I think Erika might have heard me joke one too many times about getting a mannequin for pranks. 

This one arrived with only one instruction included: Do NOT burn incense near this mannequin after 8: 34 p.m. There were some odd Chinese symbols of knives, fire, and amputation with the admonition regarding incense. I’m sure it’s nothing.

I dressed Ursula and then used my fabulous wig to top off the ensemble. 

In other news, this damn thing has startled me more than once already. Adding the knife to the right hand will be a nice addition on extermination day or in the unlikely event someone is stupid enough to break into my apartment. 

My cat Güino has already indicated Ursula is a better conversationalist than me. 

PS The prank possibilities with this mannequin are infinite! 

X

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Blowhard

Everyone’s had that experience at a party or social gathering. One guy, and it’s almost always a guy with too many opinions, (not to mention an endless supply of drinks)  is a domineering a******. You don’t want to be directly rude to the host and tell them why you’re ducking out early or on the invitation itself. 

Social media in many ways is similar. Each person gets to gatekeep not only their content, but those who participate as well. It reminds me of attending a party with that one guy who is so negative he might as well be half of a battery terminal. This dude rarely sees himself as negative. 

Increasingly, I realize that I’m hitting block a lot more quickly. Not because of disagreements, but because I wouldn’t want that person in my conversation, much less in my living room. 

One of my social media friends, one whose opinion I respect, always had a couple of blowhards who didn’t understand the concept of volume, frequency, or disagreeableness. Although it’s unfair, I name those people Mike when I run across them. 

I recently learned that one of my friend’s biggest blowhards passed away. I will admit that I initially felt relief upon hearing about it. That doesn’t paint me in the best light – but it’s true. A debilitating case of carpal tunnel would have been enough. 

Repeating what I said before, it’s not about disagreements. Rather, it’s about disagreeableness. 

As for people insulting me, if it’s creative, I don’t care what their motive is. I love being snarked and insult-burned if it’s done with finesse and intelligence. This is in part true because I steal the good ideas. 

It’s very difficult for me to get insulted if the insult comes from people I don’t know or whose opinion I don’t respect. 

X

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This Place (A New Song)

This Place
I threw down the manual and kicked over my chair
one more set of numbers might murder my will to live
ain’t got another damned day to give

this place
this place
never had any grace

every second measured, each move under evaluation
human life reduced to numbers to the left of zero
ain’t got another damned hour to give

this place
this place
never had any grace

each morning takes a little corner of my mind
listening to contradictory and meaningless instruction
ain’t got another damned minute to give

this place
this place
never had any grace

if I don’t break free and surrender from this place
even the idea of me might dry up and blow away
might not have another damned second to live

this place
this place
never had any grace

(screams)
I’m out of here!

The United States Of Gilead

In the TV show Handmaid’s Tale, there’s a scene of the traitorous Gilead commanders bragging about the fact that China, Russia, and North Korea backed them to be included in the world economy. The news out of the UN yesterday made me feel like I had shifted to an alternate reality. In part because it’s the first time the United States has openly sided with dictatorial countries.

Ronald Reagan would spin in his grave like a gyroscope.

JD Vance, meanwhile, has his eye on a new LazyBoy recliner.

Elon Musk is so busy saluting these moves that he probably has tennis elbow.

X
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47 Reasons

I wrote the lyrics and the music.

Whether you agree with me or not, this is a punch.

X
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47 Reasons
it’s coming at us rapid pace
angry, loud, in our face

hate disguised as efficiency
love apparently lacks sufficiency

apathy, discontent, unpenitent
camouflaged as money misspent

four-seven reasons to hate each other
while the rich swim in green

we ain’t united that’s quite plain
it takes a gut punch to explain

explosive, argument, false narrative
any to break our collective

instead of looking out for each other
we’re looking for an out, my brother

decomposing, destructive, deleterious
chasing power isn’t mysterious

it seems as if everything’s covered in orange
flame-broiled and full of carnage

everyone’s talking, no one’s listening
pay attention to the fabric ripping

you’re cutting off your nose to spite your face
when what we need is a bit of grace

lying, duplicity, denial of ethnicity

we used to value reason and intelligence

you’re cutting off your nose to spite your face
when what we need is a bit of grace

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#trump