Category Archives: Health

Blowhard

Everyone’s had that experience at a party or social gathering. One guy, and it’s almost always a guy with too many opinions, (not to mention an endless supply of drinks)  is a domineering a******. You don’t want to be directly rude to the host and tell them why you’re ducking out early or on the invitation itself. 

Social media in many ways is similar. Each person gets to gatekeep not only their content, but those who participate as well. It reminds me of attending a party with that one guy who is so negative he might as well be half of a battery terminal. This dude rarely sees himself as negative. 

Increasingly, I realize that I’m hitting block a lot more quickly. Not because of disagreements, but because I wouldn’t want that person in my conversation, much less in my living room. 

One of my social media friends, one whose opinion I respect, always had a couple of blowhards who didn’t understand the concept of volume, frequency, or disagreeableness. Although it’s unfair, I name those people Mike when I run across them. 

I recently learned that one of my friend’s biggest blowhards passed away. I will admit that I initially felt relief upon hearing about it. That doesn’t paint me in the best light – but it’s true. A debilitating case of carpal tunnel would have been enough. 

Repeating what I said before, it’s not about disagreements. Rather, it’s about disagreeableness. 

As for people insulting me, if it’s creative, I don’t care what their motive is. I love being snarked and insult-burned if it’s done with finesse and intelligence. This is in part true because I steal the good ideas. 

It’s very difficult for me to get insulted if the insult comes from people I don’t know or whose opinion I don’t respect. 

X

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Blessed Be The Fruit

Blessed Be The Fruit

People are discussing the complexity of the human capacity for collective evil. Whether one section of the population likes to acknowledge it or not, Germany’s example constantly pops up.

How can so many people stand by and watch the country descend into madness?

The best way to visualize this capacity is to watch the movie The Stanford Experiment. If you’re even slightly interested in the psychology of collective misbehavior, this is the easiest shortcut to benchmark how things go astray so deeply, even with intelligent and otherwise kind people.

The same effect applies to police, the military, or even people making decisions in business.

Anyone who’s never experienced the environment of a production line might not understand it. Each employee is present to earn a living and mostly do a good job. Those who own the production line want to profit while providing a living for those who work there. An interesting thing often happens, especially in poultry and similar industries.

The need for profit puts those in charge of the environment, the efficiency, and the speed of the production line often blurs the line of humanity by increasing the demands on those working it. It becomes hard to perform the job safely over time. People suffer the indignity of sometimes being able to exit the line long enough to take care of their basic bodily needs. For some, it becomes easier to dehumanize those who perform the jobs in order to be profitable and efficient.

The above can’t be explained to someone who hasn’t experienced it.

The same effect applies throughout our society. We justify less than a living wage, even though we know these jobs are necessary and that our collective decision to fail to pay sufficiently to live even a basic life is causing misery. All of this is based on economic concerns rather than the primary focus of human happiness and dignity. It is a them problem rather than an us problem.

We don’t provide universal health insurance, even though doing so would cost less than our current system. But this does not stop us from passively watching as millions of people suffer from a lack of health care or go bankrupt.

We put on our hats of authority and often forget the results of callousness. It’s our job, we think. Society apparently wants it to be that way, or we would have intervened to change it. We make decisions without consideration for how they impact people, or we are put in a position to be powerless to change things.

We marginalize certain groups. Over time, this gives us a silent yet undeniable tendency to view others as lesser. This justifies our collective behavior that often results in denigration or harm to the people in those groups.

My upbringing gave me an unholy understanding of the possibility of violence inside people. Even the pious in my family found ways to justify turning a blind eye toward what can only be called evil. Family who could observe a child being hurt and find ways in their minds, especially based on the societal norms around them, to fail to act to protect them, were they evil? Or were they just the product of their environment? Several of them held dear their holy books – and did not react well when I grew up and became confrontational about the disparity between their alleged message of love and kindness. That message had justified their deliberate choice to do nothing.

People in history are no different from us, even if we want to think they were. This gives us a pass and carte blanche to continue to behave inhumanely, even if we are technically just doing our job or fulfilling our role as citizens.

Love, X

Lost

It is the office itself that yields the honor and respect, rather than the person temporarily assuming its duties.

The expectation of someone behaving in a presidential manner is one that’s been shattered. For some, this is a welcome change. For others, it’s a chaotic and devastating reality.

We have demonstratively proven that anyone can become president. 

Growing up most of us were superficially exposed to the civil war. Almost all we learned was of dates and places and broad themes. We did not then viscerally understand how a nation could become so irreparably shattered. 

We go about our lives because that’s what we can do. 

Regardless of your political affiliation, those of us paying attention now unfortunately feel it in our bones. Whether you’re excited about the upheaval recently brought to Washington or you’re onvinced that our government is in jeopardy, I don’t think people will generally deny that this is something much different.

We are united on paper much in the same way that Jefferson’s hollow words about all men being equal applied only to white wealthy men. 

The intelligent people I trust are saying the same thing. Countries who were once allies are unilaterally warning one another and the world. People have shouted that the sky is falling and cried wolf before. It feels different this time because it is. 

This isn’t Clinton refusing to resign even though he should have. Or Bush demonstrating incompetence. 

I will be surprised if the end of February has not brought us to cataclysm. 

People need stability, as does the economy, and society in general. 

The struggle through the generations to create a reality in which all people, regardless of belief, religion, skin color, or their sexual identity could coexist in peace now resembles a dystopian fantasy. 

Power and progress are both unstable. The problem with authority and authoritarianism is that they both fall into chaos. 

Chaos is inevitable. Entropy governs the universe. 

Those who currently seek to redefine America will learn the lesson. 

X

October Surpries

“Sorry about all the dust,” he said.

The park crew was clearing brush and trees from the creekside end of Bluff Cemetery. We’ve been weeks without substantive rain. 

Because the amount of dust reminded me of an empty field before and after the crops of my youth, I told him, “A little grit in the heat never hurt anyone.” 

Because of the elevation of the cemetery and the exposed expanses of ground at the cemetery, the effect of the high wind carrying and eddying the dust and leaves was quite beautiful despite it covering me as I walked through it. 

It was shortly after noon during my visit. The sky looked like a summer sky even though the browning trees frowned at me for such a thought. 

I can’t visit a cemetery without viscerally feeling the irony of loving cemeteries for their history and emotional anchors, yet having always disliked the ritual of burial. 

I have several family members at Bluff. Several contemporaries and people I’ve known also dot the landscape.

After meandering, I took a photo of a random grave. Someday soon, I’ll use the information to find out more about the person using my research skills. It may seem foolish to some for me to do this. But every time I do it, I learn something. I like to think that a random stranger’s attention might float up into the after and ether and hit a hidden chord of memory in the universe. 

Before exiting the property, I pulled my car over and parked. I chose a tree along the periphery and did my best to climb it. My pocket was loaded with a length of wire and a beautiful prism. I left it hanging up there. In the days to come it will become more exposed as the tree gives way to November. 

Ashes to ashes and dust to dust. 

The prism is a reminder that sunlight is not only the source of all life here on Earth, but also provides the only way we can experience beauty with our eyes.

No matter what your views are of the afterlife, many forget that we are supposed to squeeze life while we’re here. Some of us produce lemon juice and others nectar. 

We all breathe the same air and for different lengths of time.

PS I hope some of you got to enjoy the leaf tornadoes that seemed to be everywhere today.

Love, X

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October Wonder

The exuberant blush of the chilly October morning passed. My arms were heavy from relentless push-ups, ones executed to silence my imagination and mind. The fleeting and mercurial chance to venture out and sit among the mountains of scattered fallen leaves passed as the shadows of the morning disappeared. The chance to hold a hot cup of coffee and share the absurdity of humor as the crows called. I grew tired of my mind, wanting only presence. So I sat and watched the gentle breeze move the remaining green limbs of the trees. The accompanying sun attempted to pierce the gauzy Autumn clouds. It was a reverie that inevitably concluded when I put on my practical shoes. The magic of the morning that I love evaporated into the ether. But still my mind wandered in the cavern contained and concealed inside of me. It’s one of the consequences of living in boxes. Swooping high above, there are a million boxes and each one contains a universe of self-contained minds. Sonder strikes differently on fall mornings. It is the interconnectedness of us that makes it worthwhile. If it feels lacking, not much effectively works as a distraction. 

And I’m floating.

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PS I wrote the above words yesterday morning. I listened to Spencer Sutherland wail “Alive.” And though I shared these words, I’m frustrated that I’m experiencing the same disconnectedness this morning. The easy fix evidently stretches too far for some. It’s obvious I don’t lack the words or the ability to communicate. So, I blasted “Alive” again and reminded myself to be grateful for what I do have instead of that which lacks. I remind myself that it’s human nature to fail to appreciate the 80% to chase the 20%. The problem is that the magic tends claim residence in the 20%.

Love, X

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Blue

I voted today, without waiting at any point. 

I voted against him for the 6th time in my adult life. It’s amusing that his presence in the political arena pushed such a blatant liberal as me into the conservative primaries.

He’s not even the problem. 

The problem is now that many of us realize that no matter how many gains we make, such a person ill-suited for political office can subvert the political process. 

It’s not my job to convince anyone that he’s dangerous. If his closest allies and advisors, combined with his encyclopedic list of flaws can’t present the clear and present danger he is to our democracy, there’s certainly nothing I can add. 

When I left the voting center, I’m certain I experienced one of the most beautiful views possible. 

Above me, the blue sky. 

Behind me? Hopefully the last populist narcissist.

But I know he can’t be. Because the people who will overlook the kind of character and behavior he represents will still be voting. 

X

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Which?

The pendulum swings. 

And the prism dances from light to dark. 

Often, I’m not quite sure which cycle has overtaken me. 

Blessings are disguised as curse just as often as gifts or acquisition result in loss of time and energy.

Things visit us. Memories of people linger as long as we’re here to remember. 

Is it melancholy or recognition? 

Love, X

Perspective

It’s all perspective. The custom painting in my kitchen alcove expresses it well: “Black Hole Sun-The same sun, yet filtered by negligent eyes, renders darkly all that shines.”

I can worry about the moronic changes in my professional life or look at the parking lot below and consider all the recent ill-advised shenanigans from those who traverse it. I can also turn and look through my large screenless windows into the living room and watch my cat shoot across the uneven levels of the massive cat castle like a feline projectile. Güino doesn’t concern himself with the outside world. His perspective is limited. Given the massive amount of information and bustle I experience on a given day, I think he’s winning in a way that I can’t.

I had infinite energy this morning. So I burned it off like useless gas derivatives  being lit at the top of oil refineries. 

A lot of our lives are like the burned gasses. We spend so much time and energy wanting to control or direct the world around us. We’d be better off focusing on the immediacy of things and people around us. 

Love, X

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Enthusiasm?

I felt clever because somebody challenged me to define enthusiasm.

I fake-stroked my beard and answered, “Imagine you’ve asked a friend to come over Friday or Saturday for dinner. If they say, ‘Of course. Let’s talk about what day or time,’ you get a definite feeling. If they say, ‘We’ll see’ or ‘Maybe,’ you get another feeling. The gap between those two is enthusiasm.”

X
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