I pulled over to see if I could capture the sound of songbirds near the junior high a block or two from where I live. I left my car running and was standing several feet away from it with my phone pointed up.
A neighbor from one of the nearby houses was leaving her house. I saw her come to a creeping crawl not too far from where I was.
“Hey, what are you doing?” She asked me. Her tone was pretty brash.
Because I was in that kind of mood, I walked quickly and stopped about 10 ft away from her vehicle.
I turned my phone toward her to show her the interface for the Merlin app.
“I’m a volunteer for the American Wdlife Association. There’s a large tiger running around within a quarter of a mile of here. I was using the app to detect sounds so we could locate it before anything weird happened.”
Her face froze because I said it in the most serious tone I could manage. Oddly, she didn’t say another word to me. Her driver window went up and she drove off.
I waited until she was decently far away before I burst out laughing.
What makes going to the movie so special? It could be the excessive butter that leads to gas-propelled walking and making you regret every decision you’ve made in your adult life by eating too much of it. The kernels that plague your teeth and make you reaffirm the decision that, yes this year, you need to go to the dentist. It could be the occasional narcissist who thinks that we need their phone lit up in order to see that they are checking their Tinder for people who are really into selfishness. Rarely do you see a brain surgeon at the theater. I really doubt that Chad or Karen needs to check their phone every 16 seconds.
And that leads me to one of the most joyous things about theaters. It is one of the last remaining places that we are supposed to pretend that our life doesn’t require our personal and immediate attention. We get to focus on a fantasy world, feel our heart race, and even feel a tear sometimes form in the corner of our eyes. Without the distraction of devices. We’re just sitting and absorbing a collective story that brings us happiness.
I’m old school. I want to see and hear the nuance on the screen and to dive in to an alternate reality for a couple of hours. To feel the spark of creativity and originality fire in my brain as I watch and listen. And that requires focus. No matter how people defend their restlessness, entertainment without focus is a diluted shadow of the experience when you aren’t aying attention.
I know people roll their eyes at me when I tell them I don’t get bored. There’s no secret to it. Even if you’re sitting alone on a quiet porch, there’s an entire world within your view. And another one inside of your head to match it.
It’s being in the moment and giving each moment your attention. I can’t help but think that so many people are sitting in the passenger seat of their car ignoring the world as it passes by. At the fulcrum of most people’s lives are their phones. They are the best communication and entertainment devices ever invented. But you have to remind yourself that for every second you are distracted by your phone, you are missing the world and the people standing right next to you. If if first come first serve is truly important to us, then surely it follows that the people already with us deserve our undivided attention.
And that’s one of the reasons I love movie theaters. We haven’t quite lost the expectation of being in the moment and focused.
Like all experiences, a great movie that is shared takes on new life. Much in the same way that doing something together has the same result. All of us can list seminal movies that changed us in small ways. None of it could happen without allowing the magic of imagination and focus to envelope us.
Yes, we also get to eat a bushel of popcorn and drink so much soda that we are afraid we might not make it to the bathroom before the movie is over.
A couple of days ago, I made a batch of healthy soup and portioned it into four separate containers. Last night, I wanted a bowl of it for supper. Not because of the cold weather, although that provided additional justification.
Here’s where my life suddenly went wrong. Like sticking your tongue in a blender wrong.
A coworker bought Erika a mix of hot sauces for her birthday last month. I’m known to love sauces. I’ve been using them all in a constant pattern like I always do. They’ve all been interesting and distinct. Erika has them in a basket by the fridge. I just grab one, often without reading the label. I like surprises.
Last night, all these tendencies came to a head. Most surprises are great. Some, however, are like opening the toilet lid only to set off a glitter bomb filled with both glitter and sneezing powder.
If you’re familiar with Carolina Reapers, you know that they are massively hot. Among the hottest possible peppers. They are about ten times hotter than habañeros and are the source of many of those crazy videos on the internet wherein idiots consume a chip seasoned with them and then vomit through their eyeballs and sweat like a manager having their expense reports scrutinized.
I heated my soup a little in the microwave and then grabbed a random bottle from the basket, pouring about 1/3 of the bottle into the soup bowl. I sat down to eat.
This is where the fireworks started. With the first bite, I thought I had eaten a spoonful of liquid fire. My tongue went numb, which turns out was worse than immediately feeling pain. Painful heat would have clearly told me I had made the wrong move. I continued to eat spoonful after spoonful of the soup, unknowingly laden with the equivalent of Hawaiian lava. I felt my eyes dilate, and that’s when the numbness abated, and the heat began to sear me like a human barbeque.
Despite this, I decided to eat all the contents of the soup and leave aside the liquid. My reptilian brain thought this might help. The heat continued to grow. As I finished the solid part of the soup, I felt like a cartoon character whose hair suddenly lit up with fire. I went to the kitchen and dumped the liquid.
Luckily, there was old ice cream remaining in the freezer. I grabbed the remnant of it, took the ice cream bucket to the living room, and began to use it in an attempt to appease the fire gods celebrating in my mouth.
I sat and imagined that if the amount of Carolina Reaper I’d consumed hit me wrong, I might find myself duct-taped to the toilet this morning or suffer the additional indignity of having it forcefully come back up and out my nose. The incredible heat of the Carolina Reaper sauce was already making me feel like I was breathing inside a chamber filled with Vick’s VaporRub.
As much as I protested to Erika, I don’t think she realized how epically I had misjudged the heat of that hot sauce bottle. I did my best to control my breathing. Before going to bed, I quickly drank two full glasses of water from the sink. When I lay down, I was certain I would awaken in a few hours and hear the thunderous rumbling of my stomach as it attempted to process what can only be described as fiery insanity. And then I would need to impersonate Usain Bolt in a vain attempt to reach the bathroom before the carnage ensued.
When I woke up this morning, my stomach wasn’t protesting more than normal, but I did feel like I was floating from the dose of preventive water the night before. After sitting and drinking a cup of coffee at 1:30 a.m. I felt the rumble.
So far, I’ve not found myself writhing on the floor or being able to shoot fire out of my nostrils like a bad comic book hero. But I do feel like I’m breathing with a mouthful of Vick’s VaporRub.
But I am nervous.
I made the mistake of Googling the consequences of consuming any such quantity of Carolina Reaper.
I didn’t know it at the time last night, but I basically consumed more of this pepper in one sitting than most hot pepper-eating champions can. It’s because I was unaware of what I was about to consume; had I known, it would have never occurred to me to try it.
Keep your fingers crossed for me.
This could be one of those days where you see me sprinting across the parking lot with my pants down, hoping to sit in the cold water of the creek. Witnesses will probably see one of the rarest of sights: fire underwater.
Love, X .
P.S. The first thing I did was drink five glasses of water, one after the other before having a cup of coffee this morning. I’m an optimist, but after Googling this damned pepper, I think I might need an IV later.
The picture is intended to be funny. Someone reached out to me and asked me to find their dad. And I did. I told them that their family crest was a cactus tree. The dad turned out to be exactly who was expected. But I softened the blow with a bit of humor. Not every quest and search ends happily. But answers bring their own peace. Love, X .
Drink water for your body. You can also use it for an exorcism.
Drink coffee for your sanity and vodka for the safety of your coworkers.
Mind your own business.
Remove sharp objects from pockets in case of arrest.
Give hugs even when you’d rather give karate chops.
Smile. Show your fangs.
Don’t open restraining orders until 6 p.m.
Laugh often. Especially when reading emails or talking to your boss.
If people complain to you, send them an invoice.
Leave a toothbrush hanging from your mouth if you want to be left alone.
Monday is a gift that you can’t return.
Mondays are 1/7th of your life. That’s 26% if you didn’t spend enough time learning.
Always carry a fork. If someone bugs you at work, pull it out and give thanks for the meal you are about to receive.
If you get upset, whisper. It’s much scarier than shouting. Doubly so if you turn off the lights before you do so.
Keep a good work friend close by. It reduces your chances of a bear attack by 50%.
Don’t battle craziness with brilliance. Nonsense is more effective and always debatable.
If you have gas, don’t hold it in. Instead, shout, “Now With Gas Power!”
If you want a snack, spend a dollar. If you want all the snacks, buy a brick.
There will always be more work. There won’t always be more time.
No matter what your job is, don’t forget that all of us are looking for a way to be happy without drowning. Don’t throw both ends of the rope if we’re in the water.
Use the stairs for exercise and the elevator for gossip. X
“He’s a big piss in a small pond” is a much better variation on the old cliché, “Big fish in a small pond.” In part because my version indicates that an inflated ego renders the water and environment unswimmable.
Yesterday when I went outside, I heard the strangest bird call. It sounded like a “hoot,” one of a nocturnal bird unseen in the pre-dawn dark trees. It had a tinge of accordionesque melody. Using one of my apps, I recorded the bird call.
Turns out, the app identified it as a “Weird Owl.”
Because brevity is impossible for me, this is in two parts; I can’t tell the “click” story without a long preamble.
This story concerns false memory and my dad’s mercurial sense of humor. Of all the things I loved about my violent Dad, his sense of humor profoundly affected me. So many times, I retell some of my Dad’s exploits, and I can see disbelief on the faces of those listening. He fired a shotgun into the trees while I was climbing them. He helped tie someone to a huge stump at deer camp and set it ablaze with the unfortunate butt of the joke tied to the stump while it burned. He stole a crop duster airplane once; rather, he borrowed it, much to the owner’s horror. When he ran the gas station, he put ignition-fired fireworks under the hood of strangers’ cars. He did it more than once to my Aunt Elsie. He did it to the Sheriff and more than one deputy or police officer. The more they screamed or objected, the funnier it became. He lay underneath unsuspecting friends’ trucks as they started to climb inside, only to fire a shotgun or pistol between their feet, sometimes in total darkness, to hear their high operatic screams of terror. If he were in the swamps and marshes with my Uncle Preacher or Uncle Buck, he’d grab the overhanging tree limbs to knock snakes out into the Jon boat with them. He loved grabbing a snake and walking into Aunt Barbara’s house to make her shriek. I loved hearing someone shout, “Goshdamnit, Bobby Dean!” It was a sign that the happy-go-lucky mayhem version of my Dad was on stage. Luckily for me, I was not afraid of snakes. I hated eating them, though; Dad forced me to attempt eating them a few times. More than once, he tossed an entire box of gun shells into a fireplace. People who could barely walk became Usain Bolt in an attempt to escape. (He loved doing this at deer camp, too.) Because he had access to dynamite to blow rice field dams, he used a stick of it to wake people up more than once. More than once, people not only choked on their cigarettes when they exploded but also had more than a few singed eyebrows. He’d grab someone’s dentures and stick them crazily in his own mouth. He loved putting people’s rear wheels up on blocks, especially at the local taverns, so that when they got in, they’d floor the gas, only to be stupefied that they weren’t moving. If he were feeling really adventurous, he’d let them floor it and rock the truck off the blocks so that the vehicle would suddenly fly into gear at an unknown, uncontrollable speed. I’ve written before that it was impossible to play Chicken with him. His motto was “Never veer.” More than one poor soul discovered the hard way that it didn’t matter if Dad was driving a truck, a tractor, or a motorcycle, you dared not challenge him unless you were prepared to meet Jesus. Dad loved putting spiders, snakes, and frogs in mailboxes. My Uncle Preacher and Uncle Beb also worked for the postal service. More than once, Dad got ahead of them and loaded mailboxes with surprises. He loved having shotgun shells loaded with too many grains of powder or adding colorant to them. Adding black powder to the ashes of a fireplace was another surefire way to elicit a scream from the person attempting to light a fire. Another one of his favorite tricks was to sneak up on someone in a tree stand and fire his gun below them. He once spent hours rebuilding a nice Chevy truck, devising a way to put an incredibly small and low horsepower engine in it. The owner got in and attempted to drive away. It took him about sixty seconds to get to 50 mph. The amount of work Dad devoted to the joke made it that much more delicious to him. I’m certain that the man told that story a thousand times during his lifetime. I have a million such anecdotes.
Over the years, I briefly remembered my dad, Bobby Dean, my brother Mike, and I saying “Click,” followed by a laugh. Most of the time, I couldn’t remember why it was funny. The inside joke became its own reward. Like any kids, my brother and I loved Saturday mornings. No matter how violent our house was the night before, we usually found a way to use the expanse of Saturday morning to glean at least a little freedom. During the fights, it was rare for a TV to get damaged. It wasn’t because TVs were expensive so much as the fact that TV was one saving grace in our lives. My Uncle Buck was an electronics tech at Montgomery Ward. He taught me how to spice into cable wires and experiment. My brother Mike wasn’t interested in any of it. But sometimes, it paid off, as it did when we lived in City View in Springdale.
We cherished the tiny little black and white TV we had in our bedroom; being poor makes such things become gold. Back in the day, when an additional cable line required only splicing ability, a curious kid like me could add channels with nothing except scissors and extra cable. Between you and me, it was also easy to get or give cable service to anyone just by running a cable across the short distance between closely stacked trailers. Though Uncle Buck showed me how to connect RCA cables properly, people usually cut and twisted the two internal wires (one mesh and the other copper). It made mowing problematic without cutting the illegal connections, but the fix was cheap and fast.
When my brother began to decline rapidly, I did my best to get him to share stories and remember things of our past. It was a way to reconnect with him. Mike’s memory once was the stuff of legend. Later, his memory became a false narrative, one tempered with an insistence on concealment. Years later, I understand it much better now. It was the inevitable consequence of alcoholism and secrecy colliding.
During one of our telephone conversations, we rapidly exchanged witty barbs. Mike said, “Click!” and pretended he’d hung up, which made us both howl with laughter. When our laughter subsided, Mike asked me if I remembered the genesis of the joke. I didn’t. Twice during the rest of the conversation, he’d shout “Click” and literally hang up, leaving me to wonder what happened. Which made my brother Mike laugh even harder.
This is paraphrasing what Mike said. Part of it is completely wrong in his retelling:
“We lived in City View, and at the time, we didn’t have that tiny TV in our shared bedroom. The Saturday morning in question, we got up and were scared to death that we’d go out into the trailer’s living room and find someone dead. We quietly turned on the console TV with the sound down. After a few minutes, Dad came out of the bedroom to our left. He smelled like a distillery. We were both scared and knew better than to run for the hills. Last night’s fight was one of the typical ones wherein Mom had provoked Dad relentlessly until they both began to punch and hurl things. Dad laid down on the couch and grunted for us to turn up the volume. Looney Tunes was on. You and I sat on the floor, wanting to enjoy the cartoons but afraid we’d move or say something to set Dad off. After a bit, we both looked at each other in shock. Dad actually laughed at one of the jokes. We were relieved; humorous Dad was somehow active after a night of anger. Bugs Bunny ran downstairs to escape Yosemite Sam, both of whom had baseball bats. Each turned off the lights with a ‘click’ at the top and bottom of the stairs. Yosemite Sam attempted to run downstairs and hit Bugs Bunny with the bat. After a couple of attempts, instead of turning off the lights, Bugs Bunny said, ‘Click,’ sending Yosemite Sam back up the stairs. He turned off his switch in confusion and headed down, at which point Bugs Bunny hit him with the bat in the dark. To our shock, Dad howled with laughter. We had laughed, too, but our laughter was tempered by the urge not to draw attention to our presence or remind Dad that we were in the room. Dad continued to laugh, which prompted us to laugh harder. “Click!” Dad began to say repeatedly. And laughed even harder. We listened in amusement as Dad repeated, “Click!” and laughed for several minutes. It had been a long time since we heard him laugh so hard during a moment of normal living. Over the next few months, Dad would randomly shout “Click!” and pretend to shut a door, close a cabinet, or pop a shotgun closed. Then we’d all laugh. If someone asked him to turn on a light, if he didn’t tell them to get their ass up and do it themselves, he would reach for the switch, say “Click,” and pretend to flip the switch.”
“Click” became an intermittent running joke among the three of us. Even though the joke’s origin faded, there were times when one of us said “Click,” and we could laugh. No matter how crazy the home life around us was. If Mom were hungover, she would bitch and complain if it resulted in us laughing. Laughter in the presence of anger or resentment results in unfortunate backlash. For those of you without such a dynamic to witness, some of the best moments happened when Mom was in a horrendous, scorched-Earth mood and Dad did all manner of things to annoy her further. How he avoided being tied in the sheets and beaten with greater regularity is still a mystery. Almost always, Mom later appreciated the jokes, no matter how angry she was then. An example is when Dad filled her hair spray with sugar water in an attempt to attract wasps and bees. When Dad was in a good mood, nothing stopped his pursuit of humor. Though I might sound crazy to say it, if Dad were drunk but possessed by his dangerous sense of humor, he was a delight. The ongoing problem was the impossibility of knowing which version of Dad might emerge once sufficient alcohol passed his lips. But if he were possessed by the drunken angels of his nature? Mayhem could ensue – the kind of mayhem and humor that perhaps only half-feral young boys could relish.
After Mike told me the story, I searched for it online. I kept Googling “Bugs Bunny + Yosemite Sam + Stairs + Click.” No results. After Mike retold the anecdote, I remembered the cartoon clearly, just as he had recounted it. One day at work, I did the “Click” joke on a co-worker and howled with laughter. Though my brother Mike had died, finding the original cartoon consumed me.
Searching diligently, I found the video “The Windblown Hare,” featuring Bugs Bunny and a wolf. Yosemite Sam was nowhere to be found in the cartoon. I watched the video repeatedly and laughed as Bugs Bunny cleverly said, “Click,” leading to the wolf getting bashed with the bat.
Mike’s version of the memory had become mine, too. The important element was a shared lifelong joke among the three of us. Though it wasn’t “Ah’m the rootin’ tootinest gunslinger this side of the Pecos!” Yosemite Sam in the cartoon we watched decades ago in our ugly living room, it certainly was a sublime moment of unforgettable humor.
To my Dad: “Click.”
My lights are still on, though both you and Mike have departed. Writing this brought a bouquet of emotions, a few of which were the equivalent of snakes falling from the trees and waking up when you flipped the entire bed over on top of us for failing to get up like newly enlisted Army recruits.
PS I remastered the picture. Working on photos and realizing I’m the only participant still alive is still sobering. To have a picture of everyone smiling is a testament to impossibility.
Love, X .
The video in question begins around the one-minute mark…
It’s lovely that the goats recognize me now. I brought them both healthy and trashy treats. And this time I remembered that there would be a tumult of birds. All of us were happy. When I left, I heard the distant roar of the tourist train approaching, so I stopped at the corner and got out and leaned on the hood of my car. A small silver car passed driving erratically. The driver was angry and screaming at the passenger. The kind of anger that easily results in danger. That guy needs more goats in his life.
Earlier today, though I was more tired than usual after work, I graced the grocery store with my presence. I remembered that an ATM had been placed on the other side of Domino’s. Placing my bags in the car, I had the sudden urge to run. There were no Trump supporters nearby, nor a rabid animal to flee from. I sprinted across the grocery store parking lot and then up the hill and across the parking lot of Domino’s. After using the ATM, I walked back across. An employee of the grocery store hollered across at me. He had watched me take off running from the side of my car and was convinced that I was being threatened or chased. It seems that he was tempted to call for help. After a few seconds, he was convinced someone was filming it as a prank. He asked me why I took off running. Because I’m inscrutable, I told him that just because he did not see someone chasing me doesn’t mean that there wasn’t. He looked at me like I was crazy. I finally laughed. He seemed relieved. And confused. I have a feeling he’s telling the story of the crazy man running for no reason. The next time I see him, I’m basically obligated to take off running in the opposite direction again. X . PS The picture is unrelated to my story! .