Behavior, Family, Lemon Moment, Monroe County, Nostalgia

The Last Tree

11/12/2023 X Teri Leave a comment

The Last Tree

The picture is of my Dad, Bobby Dean, standing on a horse. Of course. I poorly colorized it a few years ago.

One day, I’ll abandon safety and climb my last tree- but I won’t know it’s the last time I’ll do it. I’ll laugh as I look down at the people passing below me. I’ll feel the wind blow over me among the branches. A squirrel might chatter at me for being too close to its nest.

Well-meaning people sometimes chastise me for my avocation of ascending trees. They are right. There is a risk. But I don’t know of any other adults who take the time to climb trees. It’s unlike skydiving, where the risk is primarily virtual and unlikely. Those who cluck at me for enjoying it don’t understand the sublime moments of being in the trees.

I might fall and break an arm. I might fall and crack my neck.

One day, though, I will look back on my last time in the trees and want to trade an arm for the chance to be there again.

And that’s true for so many things in life. Whether it’s being barefoot in the cold creeks, walking through the grass where unseen reptiles slither, or ordering a bitterly acrid cup of coffee, one so rich that my teeth will blacken momentarily. I’ll have my last kiss. Enjoy my last walk.

So, if you see me in the trees, take a moment to quell the urge to remind me that gravity could pull me out of it. Traffic might be my demise. My arteries might invisibly pass a clot and knock me silent to the ground. An unlikely second plane might find me unexpectedly as it spirals. A shadow in the dark early morning might demand my wallet.

The last tree I’ll climb started growing decades ago. It all started with the pine tree and gnarled other trees along the drainage ditch in front and behind my grandparents’ modest house in Monroe County. Grandpa didn’t care if I climbed trees – or even found my way to the tin roof. To him, boys climbed things, and sometimes, a working man lost fingers in the long cutting belts of the dangerous lumberyards.

The last tree is waiting for me.

Love, X
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Lemon Moment, Opinion, Personal, Poetry And Prose, Writing

…though minutes long

11/08/2023 X Teri Leave a comment

blanketed by the sky blue

above the Earth immense

billowing trees verdant

dropping splashes of color bright

each one perhaps for my delight

seventy-seven irregular degrees

November ignored

tomorrow reminds me that this is the last

time is short

though minutes long

when you find yourself

where you belong

bare feet sliding across bedrock mossy

water cold washing away the day

this moment stolen can’t exist tomorrow

you cannot borrow against what is not yours

for all the things displaced for tomorrow

surely regret will be your sorrow

time is short though minutes long

what is surely yours is a song

you choose your verse

until its end

Lemon Moment, Personal

Gratitude

11/07/2023 X Teri Leave a comment

Some moments remind me that people often find themselves on the razor’s edge. Wherein one more callous word or capricious movement of the universe can have them seeking the tallest building. I won’t reveal the moment from a little bit ago. But I saw the most authentic face of gratitude I’ve seen in quite a while. I heard the clerk tell a man, “I’m so sorry your day’s been terrible.” The man in question radiated defeat and bone-weary tiredness. He was much too young to stand with a posture like the upper part of a question mark. When we both left, he reached out his hand to introduce himself. I showed him my badge so that he could see my name as I said it. I didn’t mean for the words that exited my mouth to sound so meta or cryptic: “Things might not get better, but you will be.” We talked for a minute. As I drove away, I saw him walking. His pants were still askew across the top of his boots; his back was not as arched. Is it optimism to think the synchronicity of our collision in the same time and space was no accident? Pure selfishness tells me that it was more of a benefit to me by far than to him.

I drove away and then stopped to walk over to the creek. The tornado test siren filled the air. “This is a test,” the siren blared. Indeed it is.

Animals, Batesville, Fayetteville, Humor, Lemon Moment, Personal

Goats As Friends

11/04/2023 X Teri 2 Comments

It’s lovely that the goats recognize me now. I brought them both healthy and trashy treats. And this time I remembered that there would be a tumult of birds. All of us were happy. When I left, I heard the distant roar of the tourist train approaching, so I stopped at the corner and got out and leaned on the hood of my car. A small silver car passed driving erratically. The driver was angry and screaming at the passenger. The kind of anger that easily results in danger. That guy needs more goats in his life.

Humor, Personal

Run For Humor

11/03/2023 X Teri Leave a comment

Earlier today, though I was more tired than usual after work, I graced the grocery store with my presence. I remembered that an ATM had been placed on the other side of Domino’s. Placing my bags in the car, I had the sudden urge to run. There were no Trump supporters nearby, nor a rabid animal to flee from. I sprinted across the grocery store parking lot and then up the hill and across the parking lot of Domino’s. After using the ATM, I walked back across. An employee of the grocery store hollered across at me. He had watched me take off running from the side of my car and was convinced that I was being threatened or chased. It seems that he was tempted to call for help. After a few seconds, he was convinced someone was filming it as a prank. He asked me why I took off running. Because I’m inscrutable, I told him that just because he did not see someone chasing me doesn’t mean that there wasn’t. He looked at me like I was crazy. I finally laughed. He seemed relieved. And confused. I have a feeling he’s telling the story of the crazy man running for no reason. The next time I see him, I’m basically obligated to take off running in the opposite direction again.
X
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PS The picture is unrelated to my story!
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Animals, Humor, Personal

Squirrel Surprise

11/02/2023 X Teri Leave a comment

On the heel of using some of my lottery winnings to replace the windshield of my car, today I went in for an oil change. For my car, I mean. My oil seems to be fresh. A young tech entered the waiting area where I was busy doing shenanigans. He told me he thought I had a chipmunk problem. When he came in, I expected odd news about my car. To hear the word “chipmunk” was near the bottom of the list for expectations. He went on to say that when he pulled my air filter assembly apart, he ran into a problem. I figured I was going to have to replace the air filter. Or worse. He told me that there were 50 plus acorns in there and that he used a special vacuum nozzle to get them all out. It was at that point I realized he was referring to squirrels! The lady in the waiting room with me looked up in surprise. Because the conversation was probably one of the weirdest and most rapid-fire ones she’s heard in a long time. I thanked him, after noting that whichever squirrel that was using my air assembly as a nut hoarding place was going to be plenty pissed when he returns to find his stash missing.

I’ll keep an eye out for an angry squirrel for the next few days.

X
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Art, DIY, Personal

New Failure

11/01/2023 X Teri Leave a comment

My windshield had more cracks than a plumber’s convention. So today Safelite came and exchanged a new windshield for money. The tech had it done start to finish in 30 minutes. He told me my car would run faster if I gave the engine squirrels more protein.

I also experimented with acrylic inside my light bottles. One was a complete failure. But in doing it wrong, the light bulb went off in my head. This one has a keepsake bracelet embedded in it.

Guest Post, Poetry And Prose, Relationships, Writing

Honeyed Silence (Guest Poem)

10/31/2023 X Teri Leave a comment

There’s a buzz in the sun,

Under harsh light and heat.

Then stars shine, work is done,

Until dawn heralds a repeat.

And there, in shadowed night,

Held in sweetness’ embrace,

A calming chill of what might

Become in this honeyed place.

Meticulous and structured comb,

Like the life you built amongst the buzz,

Your honeyed embrace feels like home,

Silencing the harshness of what was.

Guest Post, Poetry And Prose, Relationships, Writing

Did You Ever (Guest Poem)

10/31/2023 X Teri Leave a comment

I told you I was going to bed hours ago.

I’m still wide awake and it’s almost tomorrow.

The absence of your words screams at me.

The deafening cry of your lacking intensity.

I remember you professed a strong preference

For concrete actions over eloquence.

But emoting my messages doesn’t count

And otherwise sparse deeds still leave doubt.

I think you like my smile when it’s directed at you;

You approve of my resume for blood so blue;

And you think you’ve got me around your finger.

I think I haven’t got any more reasons to linger.

There must be better, something better than this,

An arrangement where my needs matter like his.

Somebody who could hear my words and care

About the heart that so bravely put them there.

I don’t fall in love with titles, fast cars or banks

I don’t care about your grandaddy’s professional rank.

My heart holds the things you can’t touch or see,

And I expect to get that in return, equitably.

I asked for clear expectations and kind words.

I asked to claim time and what we already were.

I never yelled but told him I was watching to see

If he’d give love that felt meaningful to me.

At this point, it’s clear, he can’t or he won’t;

The result is the same. I hurt, you know?

And the answer doesn’t matter but I’ll ask him anyway:

Did you ever really want me that way?